Those who have had a narcissistic parent can testify how damaging it can be to one’s psyche. Narcissistic parents lack empathy, show a severe sense of entitlement to micromanage the lives of their children, and may even subject their children to neglect, as well as emotional and/or physical abuse. Daughters of narcissistic fathers face all the common challenges of having an unempathic, cruel and abusive parent, but along with these they may also encounter unique triggers and obstacles on the path to their healing journey. Here are five common challenges daughters of narcissistic fathers experience and tips on how to overcome them on the healing journey. Sons of narcissistic fathers…

(2) The affection stopped once daughters reached puberty or it may have overstepped boundaries. It is common for parents and teenagers to be engaged in a power struggle especially when it comes to the teenager dating or entering relationships. Yet with a narcissistic father, the devaluation is excessive and immense during this stage. This is especially true if there was idealization (putting you on a pedestal, doting on you) involved in the beginning. Perhaps your father did show affection and care towards you when you were a toddler or a young child because you were easier to control. However, the tender hugs right after he came home from work or…

Photo by View Apart. Standard License. (3) Due to the first blueprint for romantic relationships being molded by their toxic fathers, daughters of narcissistic fathers run the risk of engaging in a trauma repetition cycle and ending up in unhealthy relationships or friendships in adulthood. Daughters of narcissistic fathers may find themselves being retraumatized by predators who are very similar to their first male ‘role model.’ This is not their fault: anyone can be targeted by a malignant narcissist regardless of their trauma history and anyone can be affected by the effects of trauma. Yet it is important to consider that childhood abuse survivors may be especially vulnerable to grandiose,…

4. Daughters of narcissistic fathers (as well as mothers) tend to become people-pleasers with porous boundaries in adulthood. As a result of the neglect and abuse, daughters of narcissistic parents can suffer from boundaries that are too porous or severely rigid, either shutting out the outside world completely due to distrust or catering to everyone else’s needs while excluding their own. For those who turn to people-pleasing, consider that daughters of narcissists witnessed their charismatic father constantly search for external validation from society and his local communities while abandoning any attempts at authentic familial connections. As a result, they developed a core belief system that validation is best found in…

Photograph by Tinxi. Standard License via Shutterstock. (5) Daughters of narcissistic fathers tend to be subject to hypercriticism and high standards that they are rarely able to ‘fulfill’ no matter how hard they try. As a result, they can turn to self-sabotaging behaviors and struggle with a stable sense of identity and confidence. Daughters of narcissistic fathers have their sense of self eroded and annihilated in childhood. The daughter of a narcissist can develop a fragmented identity made out of the very parts the narcissistic father strove to erase as well as the parts he ‘installed’ within her through cruel insults, belittling remarks and a hyperfocus on her flaws to…

Photo credit: Mayberry Health and Home Is our culture becoming more narcissistic? Research indicates that a higher number of younger people are meeting the clinical criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder and that we are now living in what might be called “the age of entitlement” (Twenge and Campbell, 2009). While there are multiple factors that contribute to the rise of narcissism in our society, access to numerous methods of connecting with others on the internet undoubtedly exacerbates the need to be seen as “special and unique.” Accompanying this need is a blatant dehumanization of others in the search for attention, popularity and admiration. With the proliferation of online dating apps…

Photo by Ljupco Smokovsk, License via Shutterstock. Awareness of narcissistic abuse and its effects is quickly becoming more and more widespread. As the survivor community grows online in blogs, forums, Instagram pages, Facebook communities and across real life communities, the number of “healers” and “gurus” who purport to help survivors on their journey continues to expand as well. While there are many incredible therapists, coaches, spiritual guides, authors, bloggers and advocates in a number of different fields who can provide a great deal of rich wisdom to the survivor community, there are also predators who mask themselves as healers in order to gain narcissistic supply (praise, admiration and/or resources). When…

By Voyagerix via Shutterstock. It is quite easy to overlook female narcissists and their even more ruthless cousins, sociopaths. Since female narcissists engage in the same type of relational aggression that teenage girls do, they can easily fly under the radar as the “mean girl” motif coming to life in high definition – something we all assume they will eventually grow out of. Yet research indicates that adolescent girls who use high levels of relational aggression also demonstrate low levels of empathy and caring towards others (Centifanti, et. al 2015). This suggests that the behaviors of gossiping, exclusion and sabotaging relationships may actually be more common among those with existing…